Singapore one out for my homies...but don't spill anything on the floor.

As a part of Brian's visa adventures he had to leave the country and go to an Indonesian Embassy to complete the process. We took that as opportunity to visit the beautiful country of Singapore - also known as the most sterile place on earth! Like Disneyland, but without the mascots.

Day time...

Night time!!!!!

Singapore is an interesting place. For one thing, everything is named "Raffles". Do they particularly love giving away gift baskets in exchange for tickets at 1 dollar a pop? Unfortunately, no. Stamford Raffles is better known as the founder of Singapore. Like most stories of Europeans stealing founding Asian/African countries, the saga goes a little something like this:

British dude is like "Hey this looks like a good place for me to make some money because your gorgeous port is a nice area for ships to come in. I can trade and stuff and you can all work for me. I declare this land mine!" 

So now, because of Raffles' great vision of trade, Singapore is one of the most metropolitan countries and has become the South East Asian hub of most multinational businesses. Most people are of Chinese or Malay descent with several handfuls of Australians and Europeans thrown in the mix. The main language is English, with Mandarin and Malay following.

In fairness, old Raffles was apparently a pretty good British dude. While most of the islands in the area were heavily governed by the Dutch, Raffles used his smooth talking skills and negotiating prowess to give the locals more governing power themselves whilst still being declared a British Colony. Oh, except for that whole racial segregation thing that was all the rage in the late 19th century, which now gives us the opportunity to visit landmark areas such as Little India.

It was Diwali when we visited so Little India was all decked out. We got to go inside a gorgeous Hindu temple with a number of Gods represented at various altars inside. If someone of the Hindu faith is able to share with us who they are and what they represent, we would love to know!

Indians know how to decorate like what?!

Sacred cows!

This one intrigued me the most. Anyone?

One of my Esprit Cohorts, Pam, who is originally from Singapore took us on a tour and stopped by this amazing Chinese Temple built in southern Chinese style. You can't tell, but the entire support beam structure is interlocking - no nails, bolts or nothing. Just pure ingenuity and maybe some Chuck Norris.

You know I don't speak Spanish.

Two warriors or guardians are painted on each set of doors to scare away any evil stuff.

Paying respects with incense.

Teaching Brian about my peeps.

Being a new country that sort of sprung up out of nowhere, Singapore is incredibly strict. It is the cleanest place I've ever been, and for good reason. They don't want you messing up their beautiful country. For example chewing gum is illegal. If you even get caught chewing gum, you may be fined. The rationale is that if you chew gum, you're likely to spit it out and that shit will stick like the dickens onto concrete (as anyone in the US knows). Funnily enough though, prostitution is legal and there is an entire red light district where you can buy an evening with a pretty lady.

Numbered for your convenience

The two red lanterns mean "come on in".

This one even has advertisements.

So basically you can sell your body for money but can't freshen your breath after a tasty lunch. And since we've stumbled into the subject of the world's oldest profession, we'll address another aspect of Singapore that seems to be a head-scratcher: same-sex rights, or more specifically lack thereof. Now, this isn't your typical gay marriage question like in the US. Oh no. In Singapore they take it to another level. Being the efficient, controlled society they are, Singapore gets specific.

Borrowing from our friend Wikipedia: After the exhaustive Penal Code review in 2007, oral and anal sex were legalised for heterosexuals and female homosexuals only. So prior to 2007, it was technically illegal for anyone, married, straight, single, gay, whatever, to engage in any sexual activity outside of the good old fashioned baby making process. But since 2007 they've decided to adopt a social policy approved by the Almost Politically Correct Redneck meme:

Regardless of your political or other beliefs, this is a bit silly. Non-traditional sex is ok if it's heterosexual, or if it's two women? Really? Come on Singapore, seriously. You have an entire section of town dedicated to legal prostitution, but a couple dudes having some adult time is a no-no? 

Ok, enough with the soapbox. Can you believe the size of the horns on this guy? They're ridiculous!

Yep, you seem to be just the right size.

Back to the wonders of Singapore: the subway. Oh the subway - it's not like any other subway you'd see in the US. No homeless people, no struggling musicians, no trash, no grafitti.  And you can't eat or drink anything on it so it stays super clean. It's fantabulous!

I ride the SMRT, S-M-R-T.

Those yellow lines direct traffic. Seriously.

The windows are so clean you can see the nose hairs on the guy sitting across from us.

A large chunk of Singapore actually sits on reclaimed land. In fact most of the "glitzy" part of Singapore is on this reclaimed area, most notably, the Marina Bay Sands and it's GLORIOUS shopping center and view of the bay. We had the chance to have dinner at the Ku De Ta - a fancy-pants restaurant at the top of the casino with my friend and Esprit cohort Angelo and his lovely lady Desiree.

Fancy-pants hotel, casino, bars, and restaurants

Hey girl.

It's like an ad for the UN. If the UN had ads...

The magic of panoramic shots.

Of course, we spent most of the time doing other touristy stuff like going to the night safari, the aquarium, the Singapore Flyer, and walking around the bay.

Our wonderful tour guide, Pam!

Indonesians are so talented

Fire breathing dancers at the night safari

Singapore Sling!

Pink dolphins!!!

Shark feeding

My happy place!

The lotus-shaped museum

The helix pedestrian bridge.

Marina Bay Sands all prettied for the night.

View from the top of the Singapore Flyer.

In the flyer

It's like we like each other.

Overall, Singapore is a very beautiful and nice place. It's a huge contrast from Jakarta so it was nice to get away and be able to breath clean air and obey traffic laws for a week. But as we noted, although it was nice to be in a place with so little chaos and so much order, there is such a thing as too much order.

So, that's our take on Singapore. We'll def be back for some getaway time despite the lack of gum.

As always, much love from Jakarta!

Leavin' on a morning bus to Bogor

Selamat Hari Raya Idul Adha! Which means,  "Happy Feast of the Sacrifice" day! Last weekend was Idul Adha*, one of the many observed Muslim holidays here in Jakarta that comes with a grand prize of a day off work. So we took advantage by going on our first weekend getaway south of Bogor to a lovely place called Javana Spa.

Tucked away in the mountains with clean air and everything!

Man made lake, little kids can go fishing here.

Neato shot of the mountain "steam"

The spa is nestled high in the mountains far away from the major cities and required traveling on a zig zaggy road through a local village which was half the fun of getting to our destination. Some of the coolest scenery was seen from the bus and felt like a glance back in time. I imagine this is what most of the Indonesia Archipelago looked like for hundreds and thousands of years before modernization. Cool to see that it still exists. 

Rice paddies

Gorgeous view on the drive up, rice fields.

We had a 3 day two night package, complete with spa treatments, all meals, a few exercise classes and hikes to waterfalls! These aren't your dry area waterfalls. This is straight up jungle style. Watch as I thrash my way through the labyrinth of lush, dense, tropical danger! 

I know you feared for my life for a minute, as you rightfully should have. Not to worry, we made it just in time for some awesome waterfall posing.

Cap'n

I WILL go chasing waterfalls, thank you very much.

The best part about getting away was the clean air and the views. I think we'd forgotten how nice it was to be able to sit outside and take in a breath of fresh air that isn't tainted by smoke and exhaust fumes.  Reading a book in the sun light with a nice cool breeze.

Look ma! I'm reading without hands!

Peaceful.

For once, it's not the smoke from burning trash! Yay!

It was the perfect short getaway, save for Brian getting sick. His poor Anglo stomach still hasn't adjusted too well to the spices, sticks, and stones we Asians put in all of our food. He traded in eating time for photo ops

Brian's artistic rain-on-a-chain shot

We wear lululemon and we approve this message!

These jerks always knew when it was lunch time.

*Super Asterisk Lesson Time!
What is Idul Adha? The wikipediamachine says it is "an important religious holiday celebrated by Muslims worldwide to honour the willingness of the prophet ʾIbrāhīm (Abraham) to sacrifice his young first-born son Ismā'īl (Ishmael)^a as an act of submission toGod's command and his son's acceptance to being sacrificed, before God intervened to provide Abraham with a ram to sacrifice instead". 

In Indonesia, to honor Abraham's willingness to sacrifice his own son for God, Muslims will sacrifice a goat and distribute the meat to all the poor people living in nearby kampungs. Not without a 14 hour prayer marathon though! Yes, 14 hours of loud speaker prayer. I actually had to pull out my ear plugs for the first time - let me tell you, I've never loved two squishy little rubbery foam pieces more in my life. 

We could actually observe a few of these rituals taking place in the village area across from our apartment and by the time we made it into Bogor, most of the butchering and meat distribution had already taken place. Sharing wealth with the poor here is commonplace. People just accept it as part of their responsibility to help those less fortunate. 

Of course, since I'm not all tied up with wedding theme colors and glitter on the mind now, I have time to be introspective and preachy, so here goes. I'm familiar with the story of Abraham as I'm sure most people who've had any religion in their lives. Would it surprise you to know that this particular story is honored in the following:

• Judaism

• Christianity

• Mandaeism

• Baha'i Faith

• Islam

Even if it is not honored or celebrated in your particular religion there is a good chance you might have heard the story. Funniest thing, religion. For as long as the people have practiced religion, there have been religious wars. Isn't it ironic though that for the most part many religions have the same roots and beliefs in the sames stories?

Any hooooo, that's your deep thought for the day. Now here's are more cool photos of alternative transportation in Indonesia.

Seat belts = the will to not get flung off the pick-up.

Not quite sure where these were headed, but they were filled with young teenagers.

Delman - traditional Indonesia Horse drawn carriage...and what appears to be a light saber.

Look Diana! 4 People on a motorbike!  - standard sight in Indonesia. Efficiency.

Expat Love.

.

A Kept Man's LIfe

When we decided to move to Jakarta,  there was a possibility that I was not going to be able to work. After all, we were moving here because of Gloria's job, and getting a work visa here is not an easy task. It takes over a month after you get all the approvals and sponsors. This is exactly the situation I find myself in. I am working with Accenture's Jakarta office to get everything in place to allow me to work in Indonesia, but it is taking some time.

In the interim, I am unemployed. But this is a good thing, because I get to be a kept man. Yep, I have a sugar mama. My wife brings home the bacon, and I, uh, hang out (I'm inclined to make a joke here about eating the bacon, but that seems somehow inappropriate). I even get an allowance which pretty much goes like this:

Brian: (opens wallet) I'm running out of cash.
Gloria: (opens wallet and pulls out 1 MEEELLION RUPIAH) Here.

Marriage is the best!

Awesome. So as of now I live the life of a kept man. I hang out at home, do my daily "honey do lists" from Gloria, and kind of do whatever I feel like. A sampling of the things I've been up to:

I've become very familiar with the layout and (sometimes lacking) selection of our local Hypermart (grocery store)

• Frustration with said grocery store led me to check out another nearby market, which turned out to be a great discovery. They sell much better quality items, and illy coffee! Speaking of coffee (on a bit of rant here), we live on the island of Java, and one of the other prominent islands of Indonesia is Sumatra. Those are two words synonymous with good coffee, yet there doesn't seem to be a whole lot of good coffee to be found here. This really has me scratching my head. Many people here have extolled the virtues of Indonesian coffee as being the best in the world, yet mostly what I've found so far is Nescafe style instant crap, or insanely bitter nasty Indonesian coffee. Are they exporting all the good stuff? Am I not looking in the right places? Clearly I'm missing something. Maybe I'm spoiled in the US, but I was very happy to find illy here. I'll keep looking for good Indonesian coffee though. It's gotta be here somewhere.

Where's my coffee named after you?!?!

I am free to go to the gym as much as I want. This has translated into a grand total of 3 trips to the gym. Sad, yes. Prior to the wedding both Gloria and I were very disciplined, and we both got in pretty good shape. I've regressed a bit, and I have to get back on this. I recently met with a personal trainer here (3 sessions came free with the gym membership). His name is Leonardo, so even if the training doesn't work out, I'll at least be on my way to becoming a ninja turtle. See what I did there? Leonardo...? Get it? It's funny. Meh...

Goals. It's good to have 'em.

Cleaning the apartment is part of the daily chores. One nice thing about our apartment is that it has tile floors, so it helps everything stay cooler. One not so nice thing is that those tiles are off-white, so every little thing on them shows. Also, we have a clothes washer, but no dryer, and no dishwasher. So, vacuuming the floors, washing dishes, doing laundry, etc. have all become pretty routine. Not that we didn't clean before, but it's definitely a more frequent occurrence when I'm not working. And did I mention Gloria's long, black hair? It's everywhere! White tile damn you!

Just like the locals and color coordinated too!

TV. My favorite part of being at home. I get to catch up on TV. And not local Jakarta of Asian TV (which can be vastly entertaining in it's own right). I'm talking good ol' American TV. We get The Voice (surprisingly entertaining), The Amazing Race, a bunch of other shows on Fox (yes we have a Fox channel here), HBO, Cinemax, and several other channels. So I'm pretty well caught up on a lot of shows. But the real kicker is sports. We actually get some live sports here. For example, when I wake up on Monday morning here, the Sunday night NFL game is on (we're 11 hours ahead of US Eastern Time). Likewise on Tuesday morning I can watch Monday Night Football. Even a game or two of the Sunday NFL programming is shown. Similarly all of the baseball playoffs were on TV live and on repeat (ultimately this was not a good thing for the Tigers fan in me). 

(this photo is for demonstrative purposes only. we don't actually watch these teams.)

But, the real cherry on top of all this is something I have because of Gloria: as a wedding gift she bought me a Belkin @TV box. For those who aren't familiar with it, this is a wonderful little device. It allows you to access the programming back home through the internet including live programming, or things recorded to the DVR. I can control a TV in the US from my couch here in Jakarta. The only requirement is that the box be hooked up to an active TV receiver.  So, before I left the US I hooked the box up at my parents' house in Muskegon, MI and since they have DirecTV we bought NFL Sunday Ticket to get all the games. Now, every week I record the Lions game for me, the Eagles game for Gloria, and whatever else I want to watch. For example, I've been able to watch all the Notre Dame football games. Go Irish! That said, there are a couple quirks with using it:

• It requires a pretty solid internet connection, which we don't always have here. So, the connection gets stuttered, and drops fairly frequently. Not a huge deal, but a bit of a bummer when it drops during the big play.
• Using the @TV takes over the TV. So even though this is hooked up on my parents' basement TV, occasionally they are watching it when I tune in. Which means I can't watch what I want. First world problems....uh, while living in a ...3rd world country. eeesh.

Other than that, it's a brilliant invention and I highly recommend it to anyone who's going to be away from home for an extended period of time. And it's all due to my awesome wife hooking me up with it. I'm a lucky man....

As long as I have wifi, I have football. All I need is no shirt and a beer.

In the coming weeks, I've got a few other things I'm going to be working on. One is trying get better at photography. There are a bunch of really cool photo opportunities here (buildings, neighborhoods, people, etc), and I'm going to go out on some photo treks to try my handiwork. I've only started shooting in manual mode a few months ago, and I've taken one photography class, so I know some basics. Time to practice, practice, practice. I also want to learn some post processing stuff with photoshop. I welcome tips, suggestions, tricks, etc. from my photographer friends. I'll also be working on my Bahasa Indonesia, which is the local language. Both Gloria and I are taking lessons, and we've definitely run up against quite a language barrier. We'll cover that in more detail in another post.

So there you have it: I buy groceries, I clean, I watch TV, and occasionally I get some exercise. I'm basically a 50's era wife, except I'm a dude. Other than that, it's exactly the same...give or take.

Until next time...

Seriously, these are my lists. Womp womp.

It's the same...but different.

I remember going to Hawaii to visit my cousins when I was about 16. Delle took me to McDonald's and was I ever so shocked to see "Saimin" and "Portuguese" sausage on the menu. What the feezy?? That's when I learned about regional specialties offered by big chain restaurants. In Indonesia, it doesn't stop there!

We've really enjoyed experiencing the "Jakarta" version of US style things. Of course, factor in the attempted "copies" of western things and it's been it's own adventure. Here are a few gems:

It's right on the corner of Holy Wood and Wine

You dunk these in mili-ili-ilk.

When in doubt, any office supply name will do.

I've never heard of this secret.

Yes, Fatburger here sells Fat Chicks.

It's just like home!

Livin' on 5 Prayers

Could you imagine if all of the Christian churches in the south had loud speakers pointing in every direction and blasted them out loud 5 times a day, every Sunday? I mean that would be some serious praising. And a lot of noise. So replace Christian with Islam, church with mosque, the south with Jakarta, every Sunday with every DAY and you've got yourself what's considered just another ordinary day. Or, what Brian and I like to call, "epic prayer 'battles'". 

Mosques or "Musholas" are as abundant here as 7-11's and McDonald's are in the US. They are everywhere. Every office has one, every mall has one. They're even at many gas stations and rest stops along the roads. This makes sense of course, because one of the pillars of Islam is prayer 5 times a day so having a mosque close-by at no matter where you are in Jakarta is not an issue. In fact, there are nearly 9000 mosques in Jakarta alone.

If you think 5 prayers a day shows devotion consider this: prior to prayer, there is the wudu, which is the ritual of cleansing head, hands, feet, and face. It is a rule that this cleansing must be done before touching the Quran, and if a male purposely touches a woman before prayer, he will need to wash again. Ah, I see. So that's why all the men in the elevator had their hands and arms pinned down so tightly to their bodies. And again, this happens 5 times a day, every day and no one even blinks.

It's incredibly interesting to be living in a Muslim majority country* and just as so much of Christianity forms the basis of many practices in the US, so does Islam influence the day to day life of everyone in Indonesia.  People do their best to schedule meetings and participation around prayer and it seems that it's a respectful understanding. People don't ask for it, but it is provided and expected. Particularly on Friday, which is the holy day, it is good practice to ensure that any male that you work with has the opportunity to pray at the appropriate time to participate in the lengthier prayers for the day. 

It's such a stark difference from what we are used to hearing in the states, where there is such a fear of showing any kind of "preferential treatment" towards any religion or even enabling folks the freedom of facility to practice in the way they want to practice (I am sure it is much easier to do so in a country that has such a HUGE majority of one religion). 

So Brian and I are slowly getting use to the daily prayers rising from the city below. Sometimes we even go out on to the balcony to listen. In fact, here's a little Friday prayer (3- 4 Mosques as heard from the 18th floor) that through the magic of iPhones and youtube, we would like to share with you:

*Super asterisk lesson time!
The difference between a country such as Indonesia, which is a Muslim Majority, versus Saudi Arabia, which is a Muslim Country, is that Muslim countries are run by Islam government and rules. Indonesia, is a republic though heavily influenced by Muslim practices due to the largest Islamic population in the world being here.

~dear Muslim friends - if I've gotten any part of my descriptions wrong, please feel free to correct me!

A Midwestern Boy in Strange Land

When I was a kid, if you had asked me if I'd ever live in a wild, exotic place like California, I probably would have said no chance. Little did I know just how far from Muskegon, MI I would go. Alas, here I am in Jakarta. I arrived here 2 weeks ago today, and since that time I've been doing my best to take in the city and get my bearings. But first, a couple thoughts about my travel here:

• Lightning and planes don't mix. My very first flight of the trip was canceled due to the plane being struck by lightning during its landing into Grand Rapids, MI. So, I had a multiple hour delay in Grand Rapids, followed by a 6 hour delay in San Francisco. But, everything was saved when I boarded my flight from SFO to Hong Kong. How you ask? Simple: Business Class is awesome! Check out the video below. It shows the view walking into my seat in business class. The seat is a little pod with room to stretch my legs out as far as I could, my own (large) tv screen, noise canceling headphones, pillows, blankets... oh and it lays flat. That's right, it's a bed! I had never traveled like this before, and it fantastic. I highly recommend it. Thank you GSK!

So despite some initial hiccups, my travel to Jakarta was quite enjoyable. Since my arrival, I've had a lot of the same impressions Gloria noted in her 48 Hours in Jakarta post, along with a few of my own:

• Traffic here is truly something to behold. Imagine cramming all of the traffic of a city of several million people onto mostly 2 & 4 lane roads. Also, those roads are not in great condition and don't feature luxuries such as convenient turn-offs onto side streets, traffic lights, stop signs, or really much direction of any kind. It's very much a free-for-all, but somehow everyone here seems to make it work and thus far I haven't seen any real accidents or anything. There are just far too many people and cars to fit on the streets. 
• As Gloria noted, of said traffic, a driver is a must. 
• People find "creative" methods of travel. For example: 



Seems legit...

• This is a Bajaj. It is a 3-wheeled form of public transportation. These originated in India, but are now built in Indonesia.  We have yet to experience a ride in one personally, but from what we're told, a ride in Bajaj is hot, bumpy, noisy, smelly, and best described as harrowing. 
• When public transportation isn't available, people take to carpooling. 





This is OSHA compliant, right?

• Indonesia is home to the world's largest Muslim population, and you really can't miss it. There are mosque's all over the place, and you can hear the call to prayer coming from loudspeakers across the city. This is especially pronounced on Fridays. Check out this video to see an example of what it sounds like:

• There is also huge discrepancy between the wealthy and the poor. Take a look at this panorama I took from our balcony. One the right side, you see the towers that make up the rest of the complex where we live, with the skyscrapers of downtown Jakarta in the distance. Then, on the left, immediately across the street, there is a village of old houses and shacks. It is a striking difference and really makes me appreciate how fortunate we are.
• Also notice the haze on the horizon. That is pollution. Jakarta is an extremely polluted city and there seems to be a permanent layer of hazy pollution covering the city. Along with that pollution, there seems to be a distinct smell here. It's sort of a mix of pollution, overpopulation, heat, humidity, and smoke, all stirred up in a tropical stew. It's definitely something I notice every time I walk outside. 
• Adventures in Eating
• Coming into this experience I figured my stomach would have to adjust to the new kinds of foods and spices. The first few days were uneventful - lots of chicken, beef, noodles & rice. Pretty standard stuff. Then, at lunch one day I took a bite of what I thought was some kind of a squash type vegetable. Wrong. Holy hell that was a pepper! For the next couple hours my mouth was kind of on fire. It was pretty intense, but I made it. I thought that was it, but oh no. At some point the next day, I managed to eat something that really didn't agree with me. Let's just say my system did not appreciate whatever it was I ate, and Cipro is a wonderful, magical medicine. 
• I'll write more about the food here at a later date. Undoubtedly there will be more food adventures in my future...

That's all for now. There is much more I'll write about later, but this post is already rambling and scattered enough as it is. Until next time...